Lesser Men
by Artemis1000
Summary: A glimpse into the life of Thor and Loki, ruling Asgard together in difficult times. The crown weighs heavy on their heads, and if you ask Loki, they have both become lesser men.


**Lesser Men**

Loki counts his blessings.

For one thing, Thor hasn't bellowed "brother!" when he greets him in that boisterous manner of his. It makes the courtiers uncomfortable, and discomfited courtiers are harder to charm and ensnare, and ultimately manipulate.

It had taken weeks to convince Thor that "it makes them harder to manipulate" is an honorable argument and more weeks till he actually stopped with the "brother!" Towards the end, Loki had known he was doing it only to annoy him, but most annoying of all, he'd been unable to prove it.

He is reserving judgment on whether "my beloved!" is worse. It makes the courtiers titter and smirk at his obvious mortification, but it also reminds them all of Thor's love for him, rumors be damned.

Loki raises from the throne and crosses the grand hall. He meets Thor halfway – him in full royal regalia of Asgard's king, Thor blood-splattered in his battle-worn armor, Mjolnir still in his hand even as he wraps his arms around Loki and kisses him for all the court to see.

This should silence the rumors for a week or two – Loki tells himself that stable rulership is the only reason he returns the kiss with such fervor.

There is a feast.

"Of course there is a feast," Loki scoffs when they have retreated onto one of the balconies.

Music and light reach them only sparsely, it feels almost like they're in a world that is all their own. They don't get a lot of that anymore these days.

"There is always a feast when Asgard's true king returns from battle, valiant and victorious."

It isn't until Thor frowns and gives him a wounded look that Loki realizes there might have been more venom in his voice than intended.

They had been gentle with another, once upon a time. Not for long, they had gone too often too far in their unlikely rivalry, but right around the time they had wed, they had believed that such vitriol would be a thing of the past.

"You are as much Asgard's true king as I am, Loki," Thor says, his voice earnest and heavy with meaning and all these good things which make people look up to him as king - and then compare it to Loki's snake whispers, and find him wanting.

"If you say so."

Loki turns from him and pretends to study the night sky.

"Don't punish me with your coldness!" Thor demands. Loki is satisfied to note the earnestness is now laced with wounded anger.

"I don't get to punish you with anything most of the time," he sneers, and yes, he knows it is unfair.

It's not like Thor has a choice. It's not like either of them has one, or anyone else in Asgard.

The war that stole Odin and Frigga and so many more takes the choice from all who are still alive and wish to remain so.

This, too, had once been different between them.

Nobody had been happy about Thor marrying his traitorous Frost Giant adoptive brother, but the lure of his magic and trickery steadfastly in Asgard's service had silenced most protests. Times had been desperate, and the Golden Realm deeply shaken by the loss of its royal couple.

"We used to be good together on the battlefield," Loki says. He lets his gaze turn wistful. When Thor steps behind him, he doesn't shy away. He leans against him, into his warmth and steady strength. "Remember when we could still afford to go together?"

Thor's arms wrap around him. He feels lips tracing the curve of his ear. Soon Thor's arms will tighten, or his hands will wander. Battle makes an Aesir's blood run hot in more ways than one. "They are still singing the songs of our victories."

Loki smiles in spite of himself. "They better. These battles were worthy of song."

They had been glorious together. Thor's gut instinct for battle strategies and Loki's vicious cunning. Loki's magic and Thor's hammer. Asgard's warriors had become something to be feared again.

One terrible day changed all that, and with it their relationship. They've promised themselves there won't be another attack on Asgard with any of the royal family around to command the defense. The first and last one has cost far too many lives.

Thor turns him around, pins him against the banister and kisses him.

Loki's magic cloaks the balcony against prying eyes and then he kisses him back.

Another council meeting, different from most only in that Loki is not the only one presiding over it.

Loki feels too many courtier eyes on him, their scrutiny like spiders crawling over his skin. A glance at Thor's stormy face tells him he shares his discomfort.

Looks like it had only taken a week for the rumors of their shaky marriage to resurface.

Sometimes Loki wants to scream at them that he would like to see them remain chipper and sickeningly in love when their marriage has to carry the burden of his. Not that he had ever been chipper, and he'd kept well-hidden how sickeningly in love he was. He keeps his silence and takes his revenge in pettier ways. Silvertongue can't be seen ruffled by idle gossip.

He covertly peers at his husband, seated on the throne next to his own. Thor looks pained, then he looks emotionless, only his blue eyes still betraying his pain. Even once he learned to school his face, he has been unable to do the same with his eyes.

Loki grits his teeth.

Yet another painful choice to make, not whether to sacrifice any of their people or not, but simply which ones to sacrifice. These decisions take a lot out of Thor.

"My husband doesn't shy away from the burden of kingship," Loki sneers when one old advisor suggests far too benevolently that they take their time.

It is to Thor's credit that he doesn't look betrayed, but grateful. He's learned to play the game. Not as well as Loki, who had always been the better trickster between them, but well enough that Loki sometimes sees more of himself in Thor than of the old Thor that had once been.

Of course, once he had gone around trying to steal Thor's throne and now he is trying to save it.

They have both become lesser men.

He falls silent once more and lets Thor makes the choice on his own - there is a cruel little part of him which still delights in Thor's anguish. Love is complicated, Mother used to tell him. Theirs certainly is. He still feels sickened that Thor has learned to make such choices.

Later he will kiss the hurt away.

For now, Loki counts his blessings.


End file.
